You don't know rashi

1. Have you ever been in love?
Yes

2. are you in it now?
Yes.

3. Do you have a crush on someone at your school?
Nope. Not anymore. And you have no idea how wonderful it is to be able to say that.

4. If you were a vegetable, what kind would you be?
A carrot.

5. What are your religious inclinations, if any?
You're kidding right? I am a Conservative Jew.

6. If the world were a sandwich, would everything be
better?
It depends. What kind of bread is it?

7. If you could meet any person, who would it be (and why)? Dead
or alive.
Sheesh. I don't know. Let's just say Frederick the Great for the purpose of conversation.

8. what turns you on about the oppisite sex (or same sex) more
than anything else?
Hair. I don't know why, but I love it. Sexy hair = sexy girl.

9. Does size matter?
Oh, no! Gojira!

10. What's you favorite subject?
Probably either English or History. Tough call between the two.

11. What is your opinion on Paris Hilton?
She's a slut.

12. What college (if any) would you like to attend?
My top 5? Duke, Emory, University of Chicago, Hopkins, Columbia, in no particular order.

13. What's your favorite food?
Sushi's pretty good. I don't really know. Sometimes a maztah ball really hits the spot. Yeah, there's really no comparison. Jewish comfort food rocks.

14. If you had wings, what color would they be?
The same color as my horns.

15. Do you have to be in love with someone? Can't you just be IN
LOVE?
You don't have to be in love with someONE, but you do have to be in love with someTHING.

16. If you could paint the whole world for a single day, would
you paint it and how?
I don't even know how to answer this question. I hate art. Someone else can paint the world.

17. Are you more of an apple, banana, or pear?
Well, pears are symbols for uteri, so definitely not that. I would say a banana.

18. what is one thing that guys should know about girls in
general
Two in the pink. One in the stink. Wait, wait. That's not what I meant to say. What I meant to say is that you really can't understand the opposite sex. But that's ok, because they don't understand you either.

19. what the fuck is going on here?
I'm just answering your questions. Jeez.

20. whats you favorite hair color of the opposite sex.
Brown

21. who likes short short?
Everyone?

22. Ninjas or Pirates?
Ninjas, hands down no questions asked.

23. Who would win in a swordfight between Tarzan and a
businessman from New York?
Why all the fighting? Can't we all just live peacefully?

24. has there ever been one moment when you knew your heart was
broken? if so, when and what was it?
good question. I don't think so.

25. How many languages do you speak? (and though it isn't part
of the question, what are the languages?)
I am fluent in over six million forms of communication.

26. If you could dye your hair any color in the world, either
permanently or temporarily, what would it be?
I don't think I want to dye my hair. I am perfectly happy with how it is.

27. What single individual is the biggest problem with American
society today?
Pat Robertson.

28. Hypothetically, if you were to come into possession of a
hammer, would you prefer to hammer in the mornin' or in the evenin'?
Also, Which would you hammer out first: Danger, or a warning?
Yes.

29. What are your opinions on breakfast food? Good or
bad?
I love breakfast food. Too bad I never have too much time to eat it.

30. Where the fuck did you get that banana?!
It was a gift.

31. what is the sexiest musical instrument?
Violin.

32. if you had sex with one animal (nonhuman)which one would it
be and why?
You and me baby ain't nothing but mammals, so let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel.

33. whos your favorite dictator?
I've always been partial to Kim Jong Il.

34. Where have all the flowers gone?
Flower heaven.

35. when will all the questions end?
Good question. This is getting boring.

36. whats your favorite melon.
Cantaloupe

37. what is your major goal in life? what do you look forward to
most?
Get married, have children, enjoy a good job. I look forward to having someone to spend the rest of my life with.

38. does death scare you?
I suppose so, but I don't let that rule my life.

39. what happened in the most tragic or traumatic time in your
life?
I don't even know. I try not to define my life by tragedy.

40. What do you want?
I want these questions to freaking stop already!

41. Out of all 52 cards in the deck, which is your
favorite?
Ace of Spades.

42. why do fools fall in love
Because only the fools are foolish enough to do so. Isn't it wonderful to be a fool?

43. why do YOU want to see snakes on a plane!!!!
Because I'm tired of these motherfucking snakes on this motherfucking plane.

44. for how much money would you become a eunuch
Trust me. There isn't enough.

45. if tangst were a drug, what would it be and would you
ODing?
Probably cocaine. And probably not.

46. why aren't you not arrogant?
I'm not arrogant. I'm confident. I think there's a difference.

47. stephen colbert bridge or chuck norris bridge?
Colbert.

48. Do you have a significant other? If so, what's your favorite
thing about him/her?
Ask me again on September 10th. Haha, September 10th update: Yes, and the way she makes me smile and feel like I matter in this world. Wow, that sounds corny. But it's true.

49. how many of these questions did you actually answer
All of them, although not necessarily thoroughly. Maybe I'll go back later.

Stale Pastry Crumbs

1. Have you ever been in love?
I don't really trust my judgement on this one... so no.

2. are you in it now?
Naw.

3. Do you have a crush on someone at your school?
Perhaps not a crush per se... but there are plenty of people I wouldn't mind spending more time with.

4. If you were a vegetable, what kind would you be?
The kind that doesn't taste like vegetables at all. Perhaps cupcakes.

5. What are your religious inclinations, if any?
And here we go, I like to tell most people I'm agnostic because they tend to not get angry, but I'm basically an atheist. Why? Well, I don't think it matters at all whether or not a divine being created the world and left us alone, no no. So then what's my beef with religion? Well think about it, if there is a god who indeed has an active role on everybody's life everyday... can't you see what that means? Why does a god grant miracles for a select few, and then murder, blight, and ravage millions upon millions of others? If all of this suffering is planned out and created on purpose... then God is the worst fucking monster that ever existed or ever will exist. I mean... damn! I just couldn't stand to live in a world like that.

6. If the world were a sandwich, would everything be
better?
No. Unless of course all the jerks were turned into grape jelly or something so that we could feed on their gelatinous insides.

7. If you could meet any person, who would it be (and why)? Dead
or alive.
Oh! Well, assuming that I could speak French or had some wild translation machine, I'd be chilling with Chopin... or maybe Ravel... or maybe Debussy... or maybe... you get the idea. In fact, we wouldn't even have to speak, we could just chill in the sun somewhere and sip delicious mixed drinks.

8. what turns you on about the oppisite sex (or same sex) more
than anything else?
They um... aren't guys.

9. Does size matter?
It depends. How much do you weigh?

10. What's you favorite subject?
Do you mean in school or in general? In school, I really like English as far as serious academics go... But any subject? I'm gonna go with Thuglyfe.

11. What is your opinion on Paris Hilton?
She um... wants to be known for her personality.

12. What college (if any) would you like to attend?
Oberlin or Davidson would be to-tally hawt. Carolina or Antioch if I don't get into those two.

13. What's your favorite food?
Sushi or sashimi, depending on my mood and how much fish I really want. But I really love it as long as it's fresh. Er... but I kinda just like to eat... so...

14. If you had wings, what color would they be?
Oh, they would be huge hardcore bat wings like the demon at the end of Fantasia! You know "Night on Bald Mountain" by Modest Mussorgsky? So cool.

15. Do you have to be in love with someone? Can't you just be IN
LOVE?
Is this one of those "high on life" preach-fests? I don't get it.

16. If you could paint the whole world for a single day, would
you paint it and how?
Hell no! That's soooo retarded. It would take me way more than one day to paint the whole world... and just think of the cost! Not to mention all of those people who don't appreciate being a ripe shade of green while I'm painting their dog, car, and children some other god-awful color!

17. Are you more of an apple, banana, or pear?
I like to eat those... except for bananas. They're a little too mushy for me.

18. what is one thing that guys should know about girls in
general
To treat girls like they're people instead of some different species merely known as "girls". Not that chivalry is a totally bad thing, but the "don't swear in front a girl" jazz is a bit... retarded and outdated. Especially when many of them swear more than me... It was an example!

19. what the fuck is going on here?
Spinal Tap.

20. whats you favorite hair color of the opposite sex.
I... don't like hair that is totally fried. Aside from that... have a ball.

21. who likes short short?
I don't like to wear them per se... but it's not so bad when *cough* leggy blondes have 'em on.

22. Ninjas or Pirates?
This question isn't even a valid question. The obvious answer is Ninjas, and not only for their higher cool factor. The reason their cool factor is so much higher is because their mythos involves intense training, precision, and skill whereas any jackass can be a pirate. Grow a beard, grab a cutlass, and you're good to go on the next boat out of port! So sorry, but in all cases, a Ninja will kill all pirates. A ninja will kill ALL pirates.

23. Who would win in a swordfight between Tarzan and a
businessman from New York?
Tarzan... but then again, he probably wouldn't need the sword either.

24. has there ever been one moment when you knew your heart was
broken? if so, when and what was it?
Nope. Except for that time when they ran out of monkey chunky chocolate chip ice cream at my local Kroger's.

25. How many languages do you speak? (and though it isn't part
of the question, what are the languages?)
I speak English... that's right, I suck. I take high school Spanish... and I can count to 10 in Korean. Big. Fucking. Deal.

26. If you could dye your hair any color in the world, either
permanently or temporarily, what would it be?
Purple streaks. That would be fun for a while... and then get old, and super gross. Luckily, it'd grow out.

27. What single individual is the biggest problem with American
society today?
Madonna. No, of course not really. She's just my token answer... I used her for something last time too. Either way, that's an utterly ridiculous question.

28. Hypothetically, if you were to come into possession of a
hammer, would you prefer to hammer in the mornin' or in the evenin'?
Also, Which would you hammer out first: Danger, or a warning?
A warning, if I just hammered out "Danger" well... there would still be more danger after that, but hopefully the warning would prepare people better (Fat chance).

29. What are your opinions on breakfast food? Good or
bad?
I think we've established that I just really like food. But pancakes are the tops! Oh, and Belgian waffles rock as well!

30. Where the fuck did you get that banana?!
From my pants, but then... you already knew, didn't you?

31. what is the sexiest musical instrument?
I'd be inclined to say piano since I play it... but I'm going to go with anything you can play while naked.

32. if you had sex with one animal (nonhuman)which one would it
be and why?
It really doesn't matter since sex with an animal is basically masturbation. It's not like the animal really gives a shit in most cases. Oh, but not beetles. Ew.

33. whos your favorite dictator?
I think favorite is probably a poor wording here... but I guess I'll go with Stalin? No real reason behind it, I just think Russian is fun to listen to.

34. Where have all the flowers gone?
They've all gone to soldiers on their graves. Kudos for the Pete Seeger reference.

35. when will all the questions end?
When people like you stop writing them. Dur.

36. whats your favorite melon.
Water. Though a nice cantaloupe can be good too; however, all melons are good for igniting / throwing off of high precipices.

37. what is your major goal in life? what do you look forward to
most?
I look forward to being rich, as unobtainable as it is.

38. does death scare you?
I don't think about it much, but mortality is rather intimidating.

39. what happened in the most tragic or traumatic time in your
life?
Gee... to be honest I can't remember or think of something horribly traumatic. Maybe it was when I was 8 or 9 and I hit a dear family friend in the forehead with a metal putter by accident. He had to go to the hospital and whatnot, I thought his wife was going to call the police and send me to jail. I cried and cried... of course, he was alright and showed up later to show me his "cool neon blue stitches". So... it ended alright.

40. What do you want?
A big, beautiful piece of ASS!

41. Out of all 52 cards in the deck, which is your
favorite?
I always liked the King of Hearts because I thought it was funny he looked like he was sticking swords in his head... and also the movie of the same name is absolutely wonderful.

42. why do fools fall in love
Hey, everyone's allowed to. No matter how foolish.

43. why do YOU want to see snakes on a plane!!!!
I didn't, I swore I wouldn't, but I saw it. I haven't laughed at a movie so hard in a long time. I'm also pleased to know that it tanked at the box office.

44. for how much money would you become a eunuch
You'd have to pay me a reasonable sum, if only for the soreness I would endure after the procedure. Christ almighty!

45. if tangst were a drug, what would it be and would you
ODing?
It would totally be cocaine, and here's why! Sometimes you read a really great post, and it makes you feel awesome... you also find that you start habitually (against your will?) checking Tangst every so often. It increases and becomes a constant procedure. It costs you time rather than money, and once you come down, sometimes you read posts that make you constantly paranoid, "Is this about me? Who is it? Should I confess my undying emo-love?" And eventually, sometimes (but not always as is the case with cocaine) you just lose that great buzz you used to get, and you just keep at it out of habit (addiction).

46. why aren't you not arrogant?
Wouldn't it have been easier to say "Why are you arrogant?"... oh.

47. stephen colbert bridge or chuck norris bridge?
Um... why.

48. Do you have a significant other? If so, what's your favorite
thing about him/her?
Nope. Leave it alone, yeah?

49. how many of these questions did you actually answer
All. Of. Them. Goodnight.

Part deux?

1. Have you ever been in love?
I always think so at the time, so, yes.

2. are you in it now?
Sure, I am almost always in a loving mood after good days.

3. Do you have a crush on someone at your school?
It's not a crush, so no.

4. If you were a vegetable, what kind would you be?
I... have no idea. I really don't like vegetables that much.

5. What are your religious inclinations, if any?
I have no religious inclinations. That's not to say I don't believe, I just don't believe what anyone else does.

6. If the world were a sandwich, would everything be better?
Probably not.

7. If you could meet any person, who would it be (and why)? Dead or alive.
Hitler would be interesting, I think. Just to see how much he believed in what he was preaching. Jesus for the same reason. Failing either of those, the President.

8. what turns you on about the oppisite sex (or same sex) more than anything else?
No idea, it's usually a combination of things.

9. Does size matter?
Sometimes.

10. What's you favorite subject?
History, politics, public policy.

11. What is your opinion on Paris Hilton?
I am apathetic about Paris Hilton. She exists, the end.

12. What college (if any) would you like to attend?
St. Johns. Or New College. If I don't get into/can't pay for one of those two, I'm going to Carolina.

13. What's your favorite food?
Right now, chocolate Teddy Grahams and lemonade.

14. If you had wings, what color would they be?
I'd want them to change color with my moods. I think that'd be cool.

15. Do you have to be in love with someone? Can't you just be IN LOVE?
Sure, you can just be in love. Whatever you want, they're your emotions.

16. If you could paint the whole world for a single day, would you paint it and how?
I'd abstain. Why would anyone want to paint the whole world? That's a huge waste of paint, especially considering there are colors in nature that paint can't come close to.

17. Are you more of an apple, banana, or pear?
Pear, I think.

18. what is one thing that guys should know about girls in general
We're crazy. But then again, so are guys. Pretty much, it's a people thing.

19. what the fuck is going on here?
I ask myself that all the time. I have no fucking clue.

20. whats you favorite hair color of the opposite sex.
I really don't care - it's just hair. The only person whose hair I care about is mine.

21. who likes short short?
Short shorts? I do. I wear them sometimes. Not often, but sometimes. Mostly around the house and on weekends.

22. Ninjas or Pirates?
Ninjas. Always ninjas.

23. Who would win in a swordfight between Tarzan and a businessman from New York?
The business man. He's way too cutthroat for Tarzan. Sorry kiddies.

24. has there ever been one moment when you knew your heart was broken? if so, when and what was it?
No broken heart, but there are some stress fractures.

25. How many languages do you speak? (and though it isn't part of the question, what are the languages?)
I can speak one well, and that's English. French is way iffy, and Cantonese just enough to scrape by with my grandparents.

26. If you could dye your hair any color in the world, either permanently or temporarily, what would it be?
I wouldn't dye my hair. Ever. Why would I try to ruin the one part of my body I've never felt displeased with?

27. What single individual is the biggest problem with American society today?
I don't think there's a single individual who can be blamed for all or most of society's ills. That's too simplistic.

29. What are your opinions on breakfast food? Good or bad?
Fantastic. Muffins, cereal, omelettes. Pancakes. Bacon. All so very good.

30. Where the fuck did you get that banana?!
As a Who-fan, I always carry one around.

31. what is the sexiest musical instrument?
Anything with strings. Pianos. And though it's not a musical instrument, I can't help but like baritone vocals.

32. if you had sex with one animal (nonhuman)which one would it be and why?
I wouldn't. Sex with animals = gross. That is way too much kink for me.

34. Where have all the flowers gone?
To the greenhouse, they got tired of being stepped on.

35. when will all the questions end?
Whenever they feel like it.

36. whats your favorite melon.
Watermelon. Nohting else quite compares.

37. what is your major goal in life? what do you look forward to most?
My major goals are to keep living and to keep being happy. Continuing to have a generally positive outlook on things. Right now I'm looking forward to college because it means the end of high school.

38. does death scare you?
Not as much as it used to.

39. what happened in the most tragic or traumatic time in your life?
A pretty terrible thing. I don't think I'll ever get completely over it, but that's a good thing. It reminds me to not go back.

40. What do you want?
Fun. Happiness. Love. A bit more sanity. And world peace, just to throw that in there. No homework would be nice too.

41. Out of all 52 cards in the deck, which is your favorite?
Queen of Hearts. She just sounds so cool.

42. why do fools fall in love
Because it's easy. So is falling out of love. The hard part is finding the right people to love.

43. why do YOU want to see snakes on a plane!!!!
Because it was freaking fantastic. Duh.

44. for how much money would you become a eunuch
I'm not qualified to answer this question.

45. if tangst were a drug, what would it be and would you ODing?
I don't think tangst would ever be a drug. And I'm too busy OD-ing on caffeine to bother with Tangst.

46. why aren't you not arrogant?
I'm arrogant because I can be.

47. stephen colbert bridge or chuck norris bridge?
Stephen Colbert Bridge. Hands down.

48. Do you have a significant other? If so, what's your favorite thing about him/her?
I am completely unattached. I like it because it's my natural state - the familiar is comforting.

49. how many of these questions did you actually answer
Quite a few.

Peter's 2000th Post Thing?

1. Have you ever been in love?
2. are you in it now?
Yes and Yes: with myself, my brother, my parents, and a few close friends…the rest of humanity to some extent.

3. Do you have a crush on someone at your school?
Meh, do some research if you really care.

4. If you were a vegetable, what kind would you be?
A yam.

5. What are your religious inclinations, if any?
I used to fancy myself a Unitarian Universalist, because their principles are interesting, but I’ve decided the bunch in Raleigh are liberals who feel left out in the South and are looking for acceptance so I don’t really care much for the current level. I also think currently that UU isn’t really a religion but rather a philosophy, and I think once I get to the bottom of that discussion I’ll find I’m not one after all. The truth is I’m an agnostic who puts faith in the axioms of math and science. By agnostic I don’t mean I don’t believe in God. There is no compelling evidence towards God’s existence nor his non-existence, so I just live my life the best I can. Currently I’d say I like the Catholics the best, because they have a very cemented system ruled by very educated men that, even though they regulate it a lot, allow for change to be made in an orderly way. I also like the fact that they believe that you can go to an okay place if you’re a good person but don’t believe in Jesus.

6. If the world were a sandwich, would everything be
better?
No.

7. If you could meet any person, who would it be (and why)? Dead
or alive.
Jesus (that is if I could communicate with him). I’d like to find out if he was a cool guy or a dick, and exactly how smart he was, and really have a discussion with him to get down to the bottom of some things.

8. what turns you on about the oppisite sex (or same sex) more
than anything else?
Pancreas.

9. Does size matter?
I’m pretty sure it does in almost everything. I just like to hope I’m compatible in the areas it would be an advantage.

10. What's you favorite subject?
I don’t know, I like pretty much all subjects. I generally have a harder time in English and an easier time in math, but I can’t really say I like either better. I suck at Japanese so you could say that’s probably my least favorite.


11. What is your opinion on Paris Hilton?
I’m not sure; I’m not really “up” on Ms. Hilton.

12. What college (if any) would you like to attend?
I really don’t know. Right now it’s looking like I’ll apply to Carolina, Northwestern, Stanford, Vanderbilt, WashU, and maybe Pomona.

13. What's your favorite food?
Good food, probably Japanese and Mexican more than others.

14. If you had wings, what color would they be?
White, feathery wings.

15. Do you have to be in love with someone? Can't you just be IN
LOVE?
uhh, I think love generally has an object, if not someone then something.

16. If you could paint the whole world for a single day, would
you paint it and how?
I don’t think the world can be painted…I’d paint things that mattered to me like my living space…I’d leave other people’s places to their own artistic control.

17. Are you more of an apple, banana, or pear?
Banana.

18. what is one thing that guys should know about girls in
general
That you shouldn’t overanalyze them. They’re only as complex as any other person, and that’s usually as complex as you make it.

19. what the fuck is going on here?
I just don’t know anymore; I just go with the flow like the sheep I am.

20. whats you favorite hair color of the opposite sex.
Not Orange.

21. who likes short short?
Kell likes short shorts…or is that orange soda…

22. Ninjas or Pirates?
Ninjas would win in a fight. I mean come on, trained assassin killers with poisons and weapons versus scurvy sailors with peg legs and missing hands. As to novelty, I’d have to go with pirates, however. Who’s best? I’d go with ninjas but they’re both pretty awesome.

23. Who would win in a swordfight between Tarzan and a
businessman from New York?
Tarzan…duh


24. has there ever been one moment when you knew your heart was
broken? if so, when and what was it?
Nope.

25. How many languages do you speak? (and though it isn't part
of the question, what are the languages?)
English and Japanese-ish

26. If you could dye your hair any color in the world, either
permanently or temporarily, what would it be?
I wouldn’t.

27. What single individual is the biggest problem with American
society today?
One person? I don’t even know. I’d say a polarized America is one of our biggest problems…so figure out who’s responsible for that and tell me.

28. Hypothetically, if you were to come into possession of a
hammer, would you prefer to hammer in the mornin' or in the evenin'?
Also, Which would you hammer out first: Danger, or a warning?
Evenin’, Warning

29. What are your opinions on breakfast food? Good or
bad?
Breakfast is yummy, especially waffles and pancakes.

30. Where the fuck did you get that banana?!
from the ring ring ring ring ring ring, BANANA PHONE

31. what is the sexiest musical instrument?
I’d say sax, one of the stringed ones, or the piano.

32. if you had sex with one animal (nonhuman)which one would it
be and why?
If there was a question that deserved a WTF, it’s most definitely this one. A dolphin.

33. whos your favorite dictator?
Attila the Hun

34. Where have all the flowers gone?
Into Hershey’s flowers and cream, a mouthful of flowers in every bite.

35. when will all the questions end?
’m thinkin’ the same thing.

36. whats your favorite melon.
Watermelon

37. what is your major goal in life? what do you look forward to
most?
Constantly improving myself. Lots of stuff…going to college, getting married, good jobs, who knows.

38. does death scare you?
Hell yes

39. what happened in the most tragic or traumatic time in your
life?
Not many traumatic things have every happened to me.

40. What do you want?
Success

41. Out of all 52 cards in the deck, which is your
favorite?
Ace, King, or Jack of Spades or Diamonds

42. why do fools fall in love
Because most people do, fools just happen to be people too.

43. why do YOU want to see snakes on a plane!!!!
Because it is a masterpiece of cinematography. But I suppose you should say did, because if you haven’t already seen it there’s really no point anymore.

44. for how much money would you become a eunuch
All of it.

45. if tangst were a drug, what would it be and would you
ODing?
Uhh, doesn’t give any kind of pleasure like any drug I’ve ever heard of…and no.

46. why aren't you not arrogant?
I’m sorry, but I am. It’s a fault I try to work on. I think it stems from my extreme pride and confidence in what I can do, and that’s pretty much anything I put my mind to. I’ve rarely come across something that couldn’t be surmounted with a little bit of elbow grease. Confucius says that pride is a good thing and that people need it.

47. stephen colbert bridge or chuck norris bridge?
Stephen Colbert Bridge

48. Do you have a significant other? If so, what's your favorite
thing about him/her?
I suppose you could say that. And as I’ve said before, it’s definitely her pancreas.

49. how many of these questions did you actually answer
Most of them…unfortunately

Duplicate Post #1

does anyone know of a class that is 6th period but not 5th period?

Anonymous
8/28/2006
08:49:14 PM

---

This post was removed because the exact same text was posted several days earlier. Post is not in violation of any policies, but wouldn't contribute further to the dialogue.

2000th Post

Ideas anyone?

It's coming up quickly, and I didn't even realize it.

Leave any ideas, suggestions, etc. here in comments.

Thank you for your continued support of the site.

(I am obviously lacking in creative juices tonight.)

Spam Removal

This morning, Thursday, August 24, 2006, a sweep of Tangst was performed, resulting in the removal of several comments to posts that qualified as spam, including posts with such one-word phrases as "cock".

Comments were in violation of Tangst anti-spam policy (General Policies, Section E). Comments were removed from posts made to Tangst.

Removed Post #43

.

We work like a horse.
We eat like a pig.
We like to play chicken.
You can get someone's goat.
We can be as slippery as a snake.
We get dog tired.
We can be as quiet as a mouse.
We can be as quick as a cat.
Some of us are as strong as an ox.
People try to buffalo others.
Some are as ugly as a toad.
We can be as gentle as a lamb.
Sometimes we are as happy as a lark.
Some of us drink like a fish.
We can be as proud as a peacock.
A few of us are as hairy as a gorilla.
You can get a frog in your throat.
We can be a lone wolf.
But I'm having a whale of a time!

You have a riveting web log
and undoubtedly must have
atypical & quiescent potential
for your intended readership.
May I suggest that you do
everything in your power to
honor your encyclopedic/omniscient
Designer/Architect as well
as your revering audience.
As soon as we acknowledge
this Supreme Designer/Architect,
Who has erected the beauteous
fabric of the universe, our minds
must necessarily be ravished with
wonder at this infinate goodness,
wisdom and power.

Please remember to never
restrict anyone's opportunities
for ascertaining uninterrupted
existence for their quintessence.

There is a time for everything,
a season for every activity
under heaven. A time to be
born and a time to die. A
time to plant and a time to
harvest. A time to kill and
a time to heal. A time to
tear down and a time to
rebuild. A time to cry and
a time to laugh. A time to
grieve and a time to dance.
A time to scatter stones
and a time to gather stones.
A time to embrace and a
time to turn away. A time to
search and a time to lose.
A time to keep and a time to
throw away. A time to tear
and a time to mend. A time
to be quiet and a time to
speak up. A time to love
and a time to hate. A time
for war and a time for peace.

Best wishes for continued ascendancy,
Dr. Whoami

P.S. One thing of which I am sure is
that the common culture of my youth
is gone for good. It was hollowed out
by the rise of ethnic "identity politics,"
then splintered beyond hope of repair
by the emergence of the web-based
technologies that so maximized and
facilitated cultural choice as to make
the broad-based offerings of the old
mass media look bland and unchallenging
by comparison."


whoami123
10:54:27 PM

---

Post is in violation of Tangst anti-spam policy (General Policies, Section E). This post was removed from Tangst.

This notice is made public in the spirit of full disclosure.

Note: Hyperlink removed on "whoami123".

[Admin Note: I was conflicted about this one until I actually read it and followed the hyperlink. I have to give it points for being clever though. Congratulations for attempting to exploit human laziness. Unfortunately, I have a fondness for Google searches.]

Removed Post #42

phentermine nice :)


your
07:30:19 AM

---

Post is in violation of Tangst anti-spam policy (General Policies, Section E). This post was removed from Tangst.

This notice is made public in the spirit of full disclosure.

Note: Hyperlink removed on "phentermine" and "your".

Removed Post #40 & #41

#40:

phentermine nice :)

your
05:29:43 AM

---

#41:

Really amazing! Useful information. All the best.
»

Anonymous
07:52:39 AM

---

Posts are in violation of Tangst anti-spam policy (General Policies, Section E). These posts were removed from Tangst.

This notice is made public in the spirit of full disclosure.

Note: Hyperlink removed on "»", "phentermine", and "your".

A Tangsty Renewal

If you haven't noticed, changes have been happening over the past week or so to the formatting of Tangst and The Official Tangst Blog. All summer we've been talking about making updates - we even had a running list of what we wanted to do - but now we've finally put some in place.

As always, we like having a consensus amongst the admins before making any large changes, but since it's summer, and varying numbers of admins have been unavailable at different times, we couldn't really get a good gauge on things. So we (the esteemed 龙年 and I) have implemented a few minor changes that we believe make the Tangst Group sites easier to read, easier to understand, and easier to use.

To be honest, a lot of the new things are purely superficial, such as going from "Posted by" to "Published by" on the bottoms of posts. Others, like cleaning up the sidebar and making it standardized across all the sites, were actually functional. Adding in the Resources section - the links on the sidebar to sites with actual information (Scarleteen, Hopeline, Planned Parenthood) was my favorite. And standardizing the admin contact info was probably a good move, too. When we finish doing everything (after the admins finally get together for voting and whatnot), there will be a huge site update notice, wherein I'll publish the list of changes we were thinking of making and a list of what actually got done.

A couple changes, I think we'll leave up to you, the Tangst users. If we decide on this, we'll put up poll notices. Polls would be open for a week, the same as posts. Or we could just write up a post detailing what we're thinking, and leave everyone to comment on it. Of course, these are just options, but it is something we're seriously considering. Any changes that occur can always be undone - everything is up to you guys, the users. Because everything is for all of you.

One of the biggest issues is about the contributors list and the duties/responsibilities of the admins. We've been putting this off since about Spring Break (which was in March), so I think we've stalled long enough? It'd be nice to go into a new year with this resolved.

Anyways, these are just some of the things going on behind the scenes that the admins felt users should know about. Changes will always be happening to make the site better, so no worries.

If there's something you'd like us to try, or have an idea you'd like to share, leave a comment or send an e-mail (they both go to the same place - my inbox), it'll get read within a day.

Summer Discrepancies

Just a list, because I don't feel like paragraph transitions at the moment.

• There were two or three days without a single post. I figured this would happen, but not as rarely as it did. And most days had multiple posts, so the users were more active than I thought they'd be.
  
  
• Comments definitely weren't disabled after any standardized unit of time. I was really lazy about it - the longest a post went without being disabled was about three weeks. Now they're back to normal because I've been spending more time working on Tangst, so a week is what will be happening. I think the longer time to comment worked out well since everyone was coming and going all the time. At least, it worked well until we got hit big time with spambots. Then it sucked.
  
  
• 龙年 was lazy, too. So there weren't any monthly traffic reports over the summer months. As a remedy/concession, he'll be writing up a traffic report for the entire summer instead. This also works out better than if he hadn't been lazy. The summer months were, of course, slower than the school months. Fewer hits, fewer visitors. The traffic report will promptly be issued at the beginning of September and will contain stats incompassing June, July, and August.
  
  

I think that's it, but I'll update if someone remembers anything else.

Removed Post #39

I say briefly: Best! Useful information. Good job guys.
»

Anonymous
12:00:59 AM

---

Post is in violation of Tangst anti-spam policy (General Policies, Section E). This post was removed from Tangst.

This notice is made public in the spirit of full disclosure.

Note: Hyperlink removed on "»".

Blogger Outage, Take Two

According to a notice from Blogger, the Blogger service is scheduled to be down for 45 minutes tonight beginning at 7:00pm (Eastern Time).

During this time, Tangst community sites will remain online, but posting and comments will be disabled. Any posts emailed to my.tangst@gmail.com during this time will be posted ASAP following the resumption of service.

Removed Post # 38

3y3 105t

blunt_dagger
10:02:37 PM

---

Post is in violation of Tangst anti-spam policy (General Policies, Section E). This post was removed from Tangst.

This notice is made public in the spirit of full disclosure.

Note: Hyperlinks removed on "blunt_dagger".

Blogger Outage

According to a notice from Blogger, the Blogger service is scheduled to be down for 45 minutes tonight beginning at 7:00pm (Eastern Time).

During this time, Tangst community sites will remain online, but posting and comments will be disabled. Any posts emailed to my.tangst@gmail.com during this time will be posted ASAP following the resumption of service.

---

Update (8:23pm): Blogger has rescheduled the 45 minute offline period for 7:00pm (Eastern) tomorrow - Thursday, August 10, 2006.

The Cajun Explosion

1. to all: what is your favorite Tangst post ever and why?

To be honest I don’t tend to keep up with Tangst. And live underground.

2. if you could change your skin color to anything (natural, not natural, patterns, whatever), what would you choose and why?

It’d need to be a rull bitching swirly Full Metal Alchemist-esque tattoo, You know, the full body Scar’s brother had.

3. What is your most convincing argument for the theory that all other people are robots?

Don’t you ever have to change your deuterium rods every now and again?

4. If you had to date another admin, who would it be and why?

Pchis. I mean. That hair.

5. Movie or book that made the biggest impact on you

Well V For Vendetta is the best movie ever. But Travels made me want to see the world, and Stranger in a Strange Land is absolutely right.

6. if you could punch anyone in the face Right Now with no repercussions, who would it be?
It’s nothing horribly personal, and I love her to death, but becca.

7. If you had to kill one of the other admins who would it be?

Hannah, her foul potato armies have too long been opposed to the righteous might of asparagus

8. to all: Left or Right? (Interpret it as you see fit)

Socially very liberal, politically go fuck yourself. I suppose that means conservative, but I prefer the term “Elite, So Deal With Your Own Damn Self”

9. How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

34 pounds sterling.

10. are you currently single?
It’s a perpetual state. Bodies not in motion stay not in motion

11. Have you had sex?

I’ve got a very loving relationship with myself

12. Do you dream in color, do you dream in grey?
Do you dream at night, do you dream at day?
Do your dreams have meaning, are your dreams a waste?
Do you dream in color, do you dream in grey?

(Yes, that was all really a question that I really would like answered - it wasn't meant to be a poem until I started rhyming.)

I dream perpetually, and so often my dreams are reality, so often my dreams are grey.

13. Do you have a bf/gf?

Answered above?

14. if you could have consequence-free sex with any oter admin, which would it be?

NanoTyranus

15. The premise is that you are stranded on a desert island with all the other admins (a little trite, I know):

Which admin would you eat first, if it came down to it?
DoctorA

Who do you think would take the major leadership role (i.e., who would be Ralph/Jack from LotF)
Sithgrl

Who would go crazy first, assuming that someone did?
Box Box

16. who do u think has a crush on me (ben tan), and i do not mean the person who i know has a crush on me who doesn't even do tangst, i mean the person who posted

Matt Minnakus

17. Is the pursuit in life the journey or the destination?

Journey

18. Do you someday want children? If so, how many?

God no

19. If you were a popsicle, what would you taste like?

sex

20. Would you rather be eaten by a shark or have to live the rest of your life with a cereal box over your head?

Cereal box

21. Would you rather marry another admin right now, or marry a complete stranger in 5 years?

stranger

23. What sandwich condiment best fits your personality and why?

Chocolate syrup. Because no one knows how well I go in sandwhiches. (I think you know what I’m talking about. I’m talking about the kind with 2 girls and a boy. A sexy, sexy boy)

25. who at enloe do you think ought to be sr class president? student body president?

Jesus. And Judas

26. Does anyone in your family know about tangst?

Nope

27. Is this spinal tap?

Duh, no

28. What is the relevance of the Etruscan civilization in modern culture?

zilch

29. Do you like eating pickled toads?

delicious

30. how many non-enloe people use tangst?

234

31. What is your favorite quote, and why?

“All generalizations are dangerous, even this one” because I hate hate hate generalizations, I’d rather be a porn peeking, asshole, dick head because I’m me than because I’m a guy.

33. What is your current life philosophy or outlook on life if you have one?

Flow.

34. What do you breathe for?

Friends.
The show I mean, fuck people.

35. What was your new year's resolution this year?

none

36. what does your username mean/how did you choose it?

Gambit from the X-Men is “The Cajun Explosion” and Gambit is sexy

37. What is your favorite type of juice?

…

38. Ideal boob size?

It really so depends on the person.

39. have you ever been in love?

I believe in it. Been in it? hmm

40. are you gay, lesbian, bisexual, or straight?

I’m not really sure. Depends. Is it Jude Law, Kevin Bacon, or Brad Pitt?

41. If you could live forever, would you?

I’d rather never feel pain.

Pastry Crumbs

1. What is your favorite Tangst post ever and why?

Well, I thought the post about a guy having sex with a dog was totally hot... Not really. I enjoy the idea of Tangst rather than the actual content of posts. Usually. The fact that I can't recall any specific content proves to me that no post was particlarly fascinating. But I still love you all.


2. if you could change your skin color to anything (natural, not natural, patterns, whatever), what would you choose and why?

Well... I would want my skin to be textured like a regenerating bubble wrap. Because I love bubble wrap. I guess color would be fun, but I would really love chameleon powers to go with it.


3. What is your most convincing argument for the theory that all other people are robots?

The three laws of robotics are as follows:
1. A robot may not harm a human being, or, through inaction, allow a human being to come to harm.
2. A robot must obey the orders given to it by human beings except where such orders would conflict with the First Law.
3. A robot must protect its own existence, as long as such protection does not conflict with the First or Second Law.
Take that as you like.


4. If you had to date another admin, who would it be and why?

Sithgirl. Of course, that is most likely a hopeless venture... which is quite alright. I think it would be for all of the obvious reasons; she's intelligent, funny, pretty, has a cute haircut, etc. At the time of writing this I am not insinuating the desire for a polygamous relationship, because she is single.


5. Movie or book that made the biggest impact on you

This is hard... for movie I suppose De Sica's "Bycicle Thief" or Yasujiro Ozu's "Late Spring" for their simplicity and poignance... absolute. Watch them, I can't do it justice.
For books... well, I like books. "Shogun" by James Clavell is marvelous to read (long too), and "Shielding the Flame" an interview between Hanna Krall and Marek Adelman, a survivor of the Warsaw ghetto uprisings.


6. if you could punch anyone in the face Right Now with no repercussions, who would it be?
ps. it doesn't matter if they're real/alive

Alpha 5 from Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers. What, you don't remember him? The little robot that constantly babbled and said "Aye yi yi!".... ARGH.


7. If you had to kill one of the other admins who would it be?

Oh... see, now this isn't fair... No no, bad. I suppose if I had to, I would kill all of them so I wouldn't have to live with the awkward stares of surviving admins.


8. to all: Left or Right?
(Interpret it as you see fit)

I am left-handed. Isn't that curse enough?


9. How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

Well, since woodchucks enjoy alfalfa much of the time, I don't think they could chuck much wood. Alfalfa is far more tender than wood, and the woodchuck may hurt his poor little teeth on a 2x4.


10. are you currently single?

....Yes.


11. Have you had sex?

....No.


12. Do you dream in color, do you dream in grey?
Do you dream at night, do you dream at day?
Do your dreams have meaning, are your dreams a waste?
Do you dream in color, do you dream in grey?

(Yes, that was all really a question that I really would like answered - it wasn't meant to be a poem until I started rhyming.)

I'm not sure it was meant to be a poem even in its finished state... Ha, kidding. I love dreams, and mine are always in color. Unless it's a super-smooth noir film, but that is rare. I dream whenever I can get away with it.


13. Do you have a bf/gf?

.... STOP RUBBING IT IN, BLAAHHHHH!


14. if you could have consequence-free sex with any other admin, which would it be?

I... uh... All of them at the same time.


15. The premise is that you are stranded on a desert island with all the other admins (a little trite, I know):

Which admin would you eat first, if it came down to it?

-Dr. Anonymous merely for the pragmatism of the choice.

Who do you think would take the major leadership role (i.e., who would be Ralph/Jack from LotF)

-I think Tinted would want leadership, but that Sithgirl or Hannah would end out on top.

Who would go crazy first, assuming that someone did?

-Cajune would first; however, I may follow soon after if Dr. A's flesh was not cooked to tender perfection. Even slightly overcooked meat would shatter my illusion of comfort.


16. who do u think has a crush on me (ben tan), and i do not mean the person who i know has a crush on me who doesn't even do tangst, i mean the person who posted

Madonna.


17. Is the pursuit in life the journey or the destination?

There is no journey without the destination, but the importance of enjoying the moment probably overrides everything else.


18. Do you someday want children? If so, how many?

Yes I do. Unless they're retarded or disabled. I don't want any of that. The number probably shouldn't exceed 2... 3 would be too much I think.


19. I have four questions:

a)If you were a popsicle, what would you taste like?

Ever had a choc-taco? Well, I would be a choco-taco flavored popsicle.

b)Would you rather be eaten by a shark or have to live the rest of your life with a cereal box over your head?

Eaten by a shark. To have be disemboweled and mutilated beneath the sea would be sooo much more dramatic. And sharks are cool.

c)Would you rather marry another admin right now, or marry a complete stranger in 5 years?

Let's go with stranger, at least then I don't know what I'm getting into. Wait...

d)What is your social security number?

Okay, ready? The combination is 1. 2. 3. 4. 5.


20. What sandwich condiment best fits your personality and why?

Well, an online quiz says I'm peanut butter because I go well with everything and often stick around when people don't want me there... though if I had to pick, it would probably be tapenade. Because tapenade, is delicious, complex, and can be made from just about anything.


21. If you could date anybody at Enloe, who would it be? (oh yeah, and why)

Aw, dammit, leave me alone.


22. who at enloe do you think ought to be sr class president? student body president?

Keri Judd. We've been over this.


23. Does anyone in your family know about tangst?

Yep, but they don't really care.


24. Is this spinal tap?

That movie wasn't funny to begin with.


25. What is the relevance of the Etruscan civilization in modern culture?

Maybe it's not such a good thing that wikipedia is so readily available.


26. Do you like eating pickled toads?

Only good ones.


27. how many non-enloe people use tangst?

Whoever in Colorado made TWHE and the Leesville people who made "Blood of Our Pens". Oh yeah, and all those other non-enloe people who use Tangst.


28. What is your favorite quote, and why?

"Nobody ever lost money by underestimating the intelligence of the American People."
~P.T. Barnum

"If you put your hand on the stove for one minute, it feels like an hour. If you were to sit with a pretty girl for one minute and it feels like a second. That's relativity"
~Albert Einstein

Just because they are so true.


29. What is your favorite song or piece of music right now? Why do you like it?

Ravel's String Quartet in F major. It is GLORIOUS. You... I can't explain, it must be experienced. Orgasmic.


30. What is your current life philosophy or outlook on life if you have one?

Well, to keep everything from being terribly depressing, I have to assume that people are good at heart and things will turn out alright in the end; however, in the immediate future I tend to see a lot of bad.


31. What do you breathe for?

So that I do not turn pink, then red, then purple, then blue, then expire from lack of oxygen. Also so that I may experience more of this short life we have.


32. What was your new year's resolution this year?

To not make a new year's resolution next year.


33. what does your username mean/how did you choose it?
(i am especially wondering about thewordofrashi,nanotyrannus,swalest'shooth,tintedfragipan,etc....)

Well, I had been discussing my choice to become a contributor (and later admin) with Box-Box, but I hadn't thought of an appropriate alias yet. I had been brooding over it for a little and couldn't think of anything that pleased me. I wanted something that rolled off the tongue (to me) and insinuated towards writing, or posting on Tangst, or something like that. As if by magic "Graffiti Pastry" popped in my head. I chuckled a little, and wrote it down so I wouldn't forget. I suppose the pastry part made sense to me because they can be filled with anything; sweet or savory, or nothing. All of them delicious in some way. Or awful, it is very easy to make a horrible pastry.


34. What is your favorite type of juice?

Fermented potato juice. Also known as vodka. No no, I find vodka rather distasteful, to be honest. I love mango juice when I can get it, but apple or white grape will do in a pinch. I haven't been very fond of purple grape juice since Temple Beth Or preschool.


35. Ideal boob size?

Well, if they were my boobs I would probably go with a D-cup, so that I could kill someone with them if I felt harassed. For everybody else... whatever is proportional.


36. have you ever been in love?

I don't think so, but then again I've never been not in... Uh... pass.


37. are you gay, lesbian, bisexual, or straight?
(ignore this question completely if you feel it is too personal)

I don't like the idea of intercourse with another man. Interpret that as you see fit.


38. If you could live forever, would you?

Yes, if only to later commit a very messy and demented suicide when everything I have come to know about society has changed irreversibly over the ages.

Removed Post #37

Here are some links that I believe will be interested

Anonymous
05:07:30 PM

---

Post is in violation of Tangst anti-spam policy (General Policies, Section E). This post was removed from Tangst.

This notice is made public in the spirit of full disclosure.

Note: Hyperlinks removed on "here".